Minnow Racing?

There is a season of the Wisconsin calendar with no name because we all don't like it. It comes after snowmobile and before fishing opener and summer fun. It is void of anything fun. It is so boring people take to visiting relatives (Rex and Mary visited us, for example, during the season with no name).

The taverns are desperate to come up with some way to break the boredom. This tavern, called the Crow Bar, has minnow racing (not a typo).


Here, in this blurry blackberry photo, we see Renee, left, and her son Garrett, right about to do battle. The course is two ordinary sections of plastic rain gutter, sealed at the ends and filled with water.........

.....The combatants must select a minnow from a bucket that looks suspiciously like it just came from the bait store.........

....here is Renee, nervous as she awaits the starting signal to release her mighty and impatient minnow.........

....the object is to blow bubbles through a straw behind your minnow to scare him into racing the length of the gutter. Here is Garret with a healthy lead over his mother, mired with a confused minnow at the starting gate.............

.....Yes!! It is Garret at the finish line first with a 175 length lead!

....Naturally, it's Wisconsin, where we bet on everything like "will the sun come up tomorrow?" Minnow racing is a high dollar event like horse racing or greyhound racing. Garrett won the entire day's tournament and took home a handsome $40. Ever notice how women just hang on a lucky winner with lots of cash?.........

By Uncle Hans