EPICUREAN AMERICANA

WE GOT AN E-MAIL FROM THE COLORADO BELLE CASINO WITH A SUBJECT LINE OF “EPICUREAN AMERICANA”.  WHAT?

HEY MARY, DO YOU KNOW WHAT “EPICUREAN” MEANS?

REALLY? A FANCY FOOD SHOW?  COOL LET’S CALL OUR BUDDY CINDY AND SEE IF SHE HAS COMPED TICKETS TO THIS SHOW.  SURE ENOUGH SHE DID.

WE’RE SPENDING TWO NIGHTS AT THE BELLE IN A COMPED ROOM WITH TWO TICKETS TO THE FANCY FOOD SHOW.  THAT’S A GOOD THING, WE NEED ANOTHER BREAK FROM THE CAMPER IN THIS EXTREME HEAT.

 

I COULDN’T BEGIN TO DESCRIBE ALL THE DIFFERENT FOODS.  THE CONVENTION CENTER WAS DIVIDED INTO MANY DIFFERENT AREAS, EACH A DIFFERENT COUSINE.  ONCE INSIDE, I WAS HUNGRY AND HEADED TO FOOD I UNDERSTAND.

THIS BOOTH WAS RIGHT NEXT TO CHICAGO-LAND FOOD.  FIRST TIME I ATE A 3 INCH BRAT.

STILL HUNGERY, I HEADED ACROSS THE ROOM TO NEW ENGLAND AND CLAM CHOWDER IN A BREAD BOWL.  MARY SKIPPED NEXT DOOR TO NEW YORK, NEW YORK AND SCORED US PASTRAMI SANDWICHES ON MARBLE RYE.

NOW WE WERE THIRSTY….

OH MY GOD, A MARTINI ISN’T FOR ME. 

WHERE’S THAT NAPA VALLEY WINE BOOTH?  BESIDES THE WINE AND CHEESE, (AND I HAD THE BLUE CHEESE), I TRIED A CUSTARD WITH LOBSTER IN IT, YUMM.  I HAVE NEVER TRIED SUSHI, AND TODAY WAS THE DAY, YUP I DON’T LIKE RAW FISH AND RICE.

HEY I’M STILL THIRSTY…..

NEXT STOP, MIAMI.

JERKED CHICKEN…  HOLY SHIT! THAT WAS HELL HOT !!!

BACK TO THE BEER BOOTH AND MAKE IT QUICK !

MEAN WHILE BACK IN MIAMI….

AND MY FIRST CUBAN SANDWICH, NOT BAD , BUT I LIKE LIKE MARY’S TOASTED HAM AND CHEESE BETTER.

I’M GETTING KINDA FULL.  GUESS I’LL FOLLOW MARY AROUND AND SEE WHAT SHE’S EATING.  HER NEXT STOP WAS THE CALFORNIA PICNIC. LOOK AT THAT, ON THE OUTSIDE IT LOOKS JUST LIKE A WATER MELON, AND ON THE INSIDE IT LOOKS LIKE A YELLOW CANTALOPE.

BABY BACK RIBS FROM KENTUCKY, AND MARGARITAS FROM THE SOUTHWEST.  AT THIS POINT I CAN HARDLY WALK….

DID WE MISS ANYTHING? YUP, THE FOOD FROM LAS VEGAS.  WHY IS THE LINE SO LONG THERE?

OYSTERS ROCKEFELLER,STEAMSHIP ROUND, SHRIMP COCTAILS, AND BANANAS FOSTER.  THE BANANAS ARE ON FIRE…. I’LL TAKE THREE OF THOSE, PLEASE!

OH MARY, RUN BACK TO THE AIR CONDITIONED ROOM AND GET THE LUGGAGE CART TO WHEEL ME BACK WILL YA?

DID I MENTION THE ENTERTAINMENT? DUELING PIANOS.

I DON’T THINK I’LL BE ABLE TO EAT AGAIN UNTIL SEPTEMBER.